Meet Clotty
Loyal. Mysterious. Always present.
Clotty has been quietly preparing the president for the day it finally happens.
Experts remain unsure what Clotty wants.
Presidential Clot Preparedness Dashboard
Clot Readiness Level: 72%
Hydration Status: Questionable
Step Count Today: 143
Snack Density Index: HIGH
Medical Advice Ignored: Multiple Instances
Status: Elevated Concern